Declining marriage rates throughout younger generations reflect a new revolution of ideas regarding the necessity to tie the knot, however, the Catholic religion may be one of the constants in the generational evolution of the institution.

Generation Z and Millennials have showcased a new revolution in the romantic process. According to the Thriving Center of Psychology, 85% of people in the millennial and Gen-Z generations believe that marriage is not a necessary component of a fulfilled and committed relationship, and 72% claim that they are disinterested in getting married.

Two women in Generation Z, one woman in Generation X, and one man in the Baby Boomer generation similarly assess reasons for the decreasing popularity while continuing to see marriage as a pillar of their Catholic faith.

“That’s the way it goes. It’s part of my upbringing, especially coming from a solidly traditional, Catholic family. You grow up, you become a teenager, you go to college, you get a degree, you find your spouse, then you get married and start a family,” said Ricardo Rodriguez, a member of the Baby Boomer generation.

The expectations of a married couple have changed immensely from the time of the baby boomers to the present. During the time of upbringing, marriage served as a necessary stage of life. “When I was growing up, if you’re not married by the 25-30 age range, you’re considered a spinster,” said Maria Gaston, a member of Generation X and Ricardo’s ex-wife.

“I think marriage is a necessary stage of life for myself and most people, but definitely not for every single person.”, said Rachel Smith, a member of Generation Z. While members of Generation Z still believe that marriage is a crucial stage of life, the societal expectation of a certain age when you should lock down your spouse has diminished. “I definitely do see myself getting married but I don’t have a timeline on that. When I find that person, I find that person,” said Rachel Smith, a member of Generation Z.

Another significant contribution to the evolving perceptions of marriage is the evolving mannerisms of the Generation Z and Millennial dating scene. “I don’t want to sound like an old lady here but I do think chivalry is dead. I also think that society within our generation is just hookup culture or serial dating. There’s no dating to find a match,” said Spurio. The days of the courtship-based dating scene Ricardo and Maria once knew are seemingly fleeting.

“I feel so bad for the girls in our generation!” said Smith.

This generation’s openness in dating standards has reflected an openness in the perception of marriage. “During my time, marriage is a gauge of how society looks at you. If you’re married, you’re considered stable by society. Now looking at millennials, what a big change! Back then, if you’re unhappy, you just have to stick it out,” said Gaston.

Nowadays, younger generations view the reasons behind why people may want to get married as a spectrum. “It’s just because of how our generation is growing up now, regardless of who you are or what you believe in. A lot of people just don’t think marriage is necessary because they want to achieve their own personal goals and they think marriage will hinder that, or they think it’s just a piece of paper. Or maybe, they’re hopeless romantics who are looking for their perfect match,” said Smith.

The societal expectations of women rapidly change, expectations of women as wives also rapidly change. The liberation of women breaking the standard of being the perfect housewife contributes to the generational opposition consensus that marriage is outdated. “I think the biggest factor is women. They are more highly educated women with higher salaries and more or less equal opportunities in the workforce. That’s why a lot of women nowadays tend to not even think of marriage because of the financial and personal freedom. Why would anyone want to get tied up anymore?”, said Rodriguez.

However, that perception can be too extreme. “I just think that women now kind of have to face this struggle of like, yes I want to be able to work, but I also want to have kids. And because it’s kind of a new role that women are having and it wasn’t really seen in the past…And I think that society needs to have more compassion and understanding for women who want to do both,”said Smith.

Other members of Generation Z also share the same sentiment – that younger generations can have a less well-rounded view of marriage. “I think a lot of women in our generation focus on the misogyny aspect of marriage. I think that the old views of marriage are outdated. The expectation is that when you graduate high school you need to find a husband, settle down, and have children. They want to rebel against the idea of settling down and being someone’ wife. But I think that if you’re marrying the right person for you, no one will make you stay home and be a housewife when you’re in your 20s if you don’t want to,” said Spurio.

Another drastic generational change in marriage is the normalization of and common occurrence of divorce. According to AARP, the Baby Boomer generation has the highest divorce rates among all generations. The divorce rate among this generation rose from 27% to 36% between 2010 and 2019. This generation is infamous for failed marriages, and serves as the practice’s primary examples for Millennials and Generation Z.

“I’m sure the high divorce rates affect why younger generations don’t want to get married. Since divorce is so normalized in society. Like people probably think ‘Oh, why would we get married when half our population has done it and it doesn’t work?”said Smith.

While divorce can be discouraging, it also can be one of the most positive outcomes of this recent trend. “During my time, people were stuck in unhappy marriages and unable to get out. I’d rather not have my daughter be one of them. So, I’m glad younger generations are discussing divorce and unhappy marriages,” said Gaston.

While all generations perceive the institution of marriage differently, there is a common thread keeping the traditional institution alive – Catholicism. Being raised in a very devout Catholic family, Maria Rodriguez describes marriage as “an institution you had to respect.” Her ex-husband also shared similar views, “Personally, being Catholic, raised as Catholic, raising a Catholic family, everything is so institutionalized,” said Rodriguez.

The institutionalization of marriage within the Catholic Church appears to have not been diluted through the generations.“I also grew up religious, and marriage is a big deal. You’re not supposed to get divorced in the Catholic Church. I just grew up in a system that really pushed for marriage and did not support divorce,” said Spurio.

While the Catholic Church emphasizes the institutional importance of marriage, the values showcased through religious teachings also keep marriage alive. “I am quite religious and marriage is one of the sacraments. So being a religious person and knowing I’m supposed to share a covenant with that person, strengthen our relationship, and then have Jesus as the center of that is really important to me,” said Smith.

Despite liberating gender expectations, a rise in failed marriages, and a new style of primarily casual dating, religion remains a constant reminder of the importance of marriage to Catholics of all generations.

Source: https://www.boundless.org/relationships/why-get-married/